Friends, Politics and Social Media: Can We Disagree and Still Coexist?


There was a time in India when people with completely different political opinions still remained close friends.

One person voted Congress.
Another supported BJP.
Someone else supported DMK.
One was deeply religious.
Another was secular.

Yet:

  • they attended weddings together,
  • worked together,
  • helped each other in business,
  • had tea shop debates,
  • argued loudly,
  • and still remained connected.

Politics was just one part of life, not the entire identity of a person.

But social media slowly changed this culture.

Today, a political opinion is no longer seen as “just an opinion.” It has become an emotional identity marker. The moment someone openly supports a political party or reacts to a religious issue, people start placing them into categories and labels.

This is where the real pain begins.

In my case, I have many close Muslim and Christian friends — friends from work, business, ex-employees and social circles. I never questioned their religious practices or political preferences. I never had a problem if they supported Congress or DMK.

But when I openly supported BJP or reacted when I felt Hindu beliefs were mocked or insulted, suddenly the reactions changed.

Some called me and expressed disappointment.
Some unfriended me silently.
Some stopped engaging completely.
Some branded me a “Sanghi.”

That word itself is often used today as if it is meant to socially isolate someone.

The irony is: supporting a political party in a democracy should be normal.

is not a banned organization or an underground movement. It is a democratically elected political party, just like or .

Then why has society become emotionally uncomfortable with political differences?

That is the bigger question.

I realized this issue is no longer just about BJP, Congress, religion or ideology. The deeper issue is that society is slowly losing the ability to coexist despite disagreement.

Earlier we had emotional maturity to separate:

  • friendship from politics,
  • people from opinions,
  • relationships from ideology.

Today social media mixes everything together.

Algorithms reward outrage.
Politics becomes identity.
Identity becomes emotion.
Emotion becomes division.

Even normal people slowly become emotionally reactive online.

A person who would happily sit and have coffee with you in real life may still get disturbed by your political post online.

That is the strange contradiction of the social media era.

The dangerous part is not disagreement. Disagreement is healthy in a democracy.

The dangerous part is emotional isolation.

When people stop expressing openly:

  • resentment builds silently,
  • echo chambers grow,
  • society becomes polarized,
  • and friendships become conditional.

Maybe a healthier society is not one where everyone agrees.

Maybe a healthier society is one where:

  • people openly express opinions,
  • disagree strongly,
  • debate emotionally,
  • cool down,
  • and still remain human with one another afterward.

India survived for centuries because of coexistence despite differences in:

  • religion,
  • language,
  • caste,
  • food,
  • region,
  • and politics.

“Unity in diversity” is not about similarity.
It is about emotional maturity despite differences.

Social media has tested that maturity.

Now society must evolve again.

Because if friendships cannot survive political disagreement, then politics has become bigger than humanity itself.

DMK AIADMK & I


I was 11 years old when JayaLalitha swept TN polls & she became the Chief Minister for the first time… She won because;

  • of publicising her saree removing episode in the assembly…
  • of the alliance with congress and gained the sympathy votes gained by Rajiv Gandhi’s assassination…

That was an age where I was not interested in politics & that would be the talk of the town…

JJ’s first tenure started when I was too young and ended when I was 16 & an age where I started following politics…

That was a rule filled with autocracy & corruption… The whole state was against her & year 1996 was an entertaining year…

  • It saw congress splitting in TN and Tamil Manila Congress emerged and allied with DMK…
  • Super Star RajiniKanth almost entered into politics…
  • Sun Tv emerged into prominence because of Sandlehood smuggler Veerappan…

All the above factors & anti-incubancy against JJ saw the end of her rule… Entire TN cherished & it was almost end of road for JJ…

Then 1996 was also a turning point for the state of TN… State was lagging behind other states & pro -capitalist DMK came to power both on the Centre with Third front & in the state…

Tamil Nadu saw true development in terms of infrastructure & with industries…

When left front collapsed in 2 years in centre… BJP lead NDA came to power & DMK right fully joins NDA…

Then everyone felt DMK would make it back… As JJ was facing corruption charges & still her autocratic rule was fresh in the mind… But there was an under-current which made all political observers wrong…

DMK collapsed & JJ returned to power… This time she did good governance with her autocratic attitude…

In between NDA collapsed in the centre during 2004 & DMK was prompt in changing alliance with Congress lead UPA and won all 40 parliamentary seats in TN & Puducherry…

Then came 2006 and people were applauding JJ’s rule & it was thought she will win… But DMK chief’s last minute promise of 1 KG rice for Re.1 clicked… Also it was perfectly timed & JJ couldn’t do much…

In spite she won 70 seats & DMK formed a government in spite of being a minority…

It was return of UPA for the second time… This 2 year rule is full of corruption & DMK minister was in the lime light of India’s biggest corruption till date… Also UPA 2 was filled with controversies like;

  • 2G Spectrum Scandal
  • Common Wealth Games Scandal
  • Appointment of Chief Vigilance Officer
  • Inflation

Now it is 2011 and the political scenario in TN is heated up… DMK has gone for polarisation politics & gave lavish numbers to number caste based parties… Their ugly quarrel with Congress happened in public & finally DMK bowed down…

As per vote share DMK is comfortable with 49% against AIADMK’s 41%… But DMK has to fight;

  • Anti-incubancy
  • 2G Spectrum Scam
  • Already fragile alliance with congress
  • Inflation
  • Monopoly & Domination of Real Estate, Media, Movies & Television
  • Groupism within the family

So far nothing is going right for DMK… Also seeing their feud with congress there can be post election alliance if there is a broken verdict…

Also DMK was in power in the Centre for last 15 years… May 13 should be an interesting day & it time to have fun…

Are we emotional idiots?


At least with me it is true… Being a person who has favoured DMK since my childhood; I decided to vote for AIADMK… Reason being too much domination of Karunanidhi’s family on almost every industry; particularly Movies, Real estate & Television…

Also the 2G spectrum scam added fuel to that fire…

I being educated & the ability to think fell prey for emotions…

Yes this current feud between DMK & Congress made me to sympathise DMK… For a moment anger against them became sympathy…

Only now I realize the importance of emotional voters whose mindset fluctuates & can change the game…